First Impression: A little country
Last Impression: A lot country
A few months after separating from my ex, I decided to start dating again. I wasn't looking for anything too serious, but wanted someone who I could go out with. I wanted to be able to go out to dinner, go see a movie, go play some putt putt, go walk around downtown...but that is hard to do when you are single and all of your friends are married or in relationships and/or have children. So when I told my friends I wanted to start dating again, they were great and very supportive and wanted to help.
One of them, let's call her Ellen, decided to set me up with a friend of her husband. Her husband, who I'll call Clark, is a nice man, but really country. Now, although I was born and raised in this area, I am just not a country girl. Have nothing against those that are, it's just not me. I don't like country music, I am scared of guns, farm animals are cool but smelly, and do people REALLY need a 10 foot antenna when their truck is already 3 times as tall as all the other vehicles on the road?? Seems like they'd get better reception anyway from being that high up! Sorry, I got sidetracked....So Clark had this friend, who I'll call Eddie. I was nervous to talk to him, because I'm a pretty shy person and it had been 6 years since I had done the dating thing. I asked Ellen, "Are you sure he isn't too country for me? Are you sure you think we'll be able to have a good conversation? Are you sure he isn't going to pass out if I told him I voted for Obama?" She assured me that he was a great guy and I told her she could give Eddie my number.
A couple nights later, I get a call from a number I don't recognize. I answer and hear something like, "I tawk Jeannie?" Ahh...must be Eddie. Our conversation is hard to type because for some reason redneck ebonics is not a language that is usually written...but it went something like this:
Me: "This is Jenny. You must be Eddie?"
Eddie: "Yaep, dis is me."
Me: "How are you doing?"
Eddie: "Perty near gud, you?"
Me: "I'm good, thanks"
Now...the small talk went on for a few minutes, with me spending 90% of that time having to ask him to repeat himself and still having no idea what he was saying. I knew I didn't want to actually go on a date with him, but he did seem like a truly nice guy, so I was also trying to figure out how to nicely decline if he asked me out. Then it came to this:
Eddie: "Reckon you'd wanna meet up?"
Me: (sheer curiosity) "What would you want to do if we were to go on a date?"
Eddie: "uhh"...long pause..."Ya like fishin?"
What? How do you even respond to that? Who the heck goes fishing on a first date?? Oh the wonderful ambiance of live worms and dead fish! I could just picture myself out on a little boat with this guy, stuck in the middle of a lake, with nothing to do but try to make conversation with someone I could barely understand. As one friend said...If it got too bad, I guess I could have made a swim for it!
After laughing out of surprise and quickly catching myself, I told Eddie that I did not like fishing, and maybe we just didn't have much in common. I remember thinking to myself, "Wow...that was crazy!" Looking back, I should have known that was just foreshadowing my future dating experiences!
Thanks for reading my blog! Keep an eye out for my next story...The Attack of the Leprechaun!
